New Starter

Well, the bit I hate finally arrives. I don't like starting new jobs. There's too much uncertainty, and process to learn, too many new people to meet and names to remember and even finding your way around a new building can be a challenge. There's also the knowledge that for a fair amount of time, you really are useless, and even the current office numpty looks down from a position of power. Just grin and bear it.

The commute was easy though, but even so, agent Eric led the way and took me into reception. Once there, I was told my boss would be late, as he has kids, so someonele else would come down. This turned out to be Gregory, who took me up to meet the rest of the group. I think there must have been about 30 people in all, and Gregory proudly introduced me to all of them with "He's ok, he likes football", which was generally greeted with much approval. Not a bad start then.

As with nearly all first days I've had, they were woefully underprepared. Not only were no computer accounts set up, but no bloody computer was set up either. This will arrive tomorrow apparently. There was also no door pass, which means "asking permission" (borrowing a pass) to go to the toilet. A temporary pass would be available at the end of the week, although this would still not get me into the Series 60 software section. SEMC had to implement some extra security measures to use this software, but this place is tighter than a duck's arse. No pass would also mean no access to food in the canteen, as the cards are charged up with cash at machines, and then used to pay at the tills. A good temporary solution in my mind is that my first week's lunches would be free :-)

One thing that did strike me as odd, is that there were no coffee machines anywhere. It turns out you have to go to the canteen for coffee (in a separate building), with only water being available in the office. Coffee breaks here though are social occasions and last over half an hour, one in the morning and one in the afternoon. Having so little caffeine (usually via tea) will take some getting used to as I used to have between 10 & 15 a day at SEMC.

When luchtime arrived though, what a treat; the staff canteen is absolutely fantastic. There are 5 different serving counters dealing with different types of hot dishes, and the meat components of all are cooked in front of you. There's a salad bar, a desert bar, and a drinks bar, wine included. The guys in the team all piled in together and sat together, and it seemed to last for ages, although including coffee, it was perhaps an hour. It was a proper lunch though and not some hurried bollocks sandwich, gobbled at your desk, while surfing the net and spilling crumbs into the keyboard. Not that I've been doing that for the last 4.5 years, as SEMC's canteen was ok too, but most of my working life has been punctuated only be sandwiches for lunch, which is frankly, utterly shite and should be deemed unacceptable conditions for all employees. Eating the biggest meal of the day at the end of the day is a sure fire path to poor health.

So after a very good lunch (some form of white fish if you want to know) I settled down at my baron desk to consume the documentation I'd been given. Another downside of first days is the terminal boredem as you try and soak up poorly written, inaccurate and out of date documentation, written by people who didn't want to, and who you suspect might be trying to booby trap your whole career by writing mischief.

While I was busy soaking up the new job, Eric had been busy trying to find me somewhere to live. So in the evening I went to view a spare room in a house he found a mile or two from the office. It's an all inclusive price, the run of the house etc, and my own space, and is only a temporary solution while I hunt down the flat of my dreams, but it's good enough for a month, maybe longer. This night would be my last with Eric and Carine and the cat and dog. My stay finished as it had started, with an Italian meal, and wine.

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